As I have been preparing for this trip to East Asia, I have come to realize some things about my personality. I use to be a germaphobic, hypochondriac, afraid of failure, well for that matter all around afraid to do anything. It stopped me from living, but I have to admit that there is a silver lining to everything. You can’t always see it right away through the pain, fear, anger, or hardship, but it is there waiting for YOU to discover it.
That 7 year period of time I have looked back on with hate and disgust, but as time goes and I reflect on it I learn more and more about who I am, who I don’t want to be, and who I want to strive to be. For if I hadn’t gone through all that I might be more apathetic, but instead I am hungry for life and what it has to offer. So this may seem strange, but I am in awe of how my Father is using my past and its wounds to help heal me.
So my latest discovery is that I am a boy scout. I know that because I am a girl I should be calling myself a girl scout, but I don’t know anything about the girl scouts (other than they sell some of the most delicious cookies ever) and so I don’t know if they’re mentality is the same. So I am packing and I just keep thinking, “Always be prepared. I just want to be prepared.” There are aspects of this trip that bother me because I don’t know how to prepare for them. I have spent some time stressing about it, but on the eve of this adventure I realized something VERY important. It is an ADVENTURE. When you go on an adventure you can’t really be prepared for everything that is going to be thrown your way. Some of my favorite things to talk about are all the injuries I have gotten over the years from soccer. I was not prepared for any of them, they hurt, some of them were scary, but I always got back on the field and played through it.
So I have realized that I need to be the soccer player AND the boy scout. There is nothing wrong with being prepared, but when I do take a hit I need to get back up and keep playing; even through the pain. It is and never will be easy, there are times I have to remind myself daily not to let my past stop me or not to fall back into it, but my greatest tools are hope and confidence in a Father who will help me up and teach me how heal my battle scares. There is always is always a silver lining, we just need to wipe the tears from our eyes so that we can see it. ^_^
Sunday, May 23, 2010
Thursday, May 6, 2010
Thoughts From 30,000ft
I sit quietly, gazing out the small oval window at the ground 30,000ft below. A smile eases onto my face as I think to myself, “this is a small glimpse of what God sees all the time.” The world from this perspective is breathtaking. That may seem like some cheesy line from a movie or book, but does that make it any less true?
Have you ever thought about how beautiful our Earth is? I mean really think about it. As I gaze at it now, my mind wanders to my art class I just took this semester. There are two things that my teacher said that are running through my head. “Take a step back from your work and look at it from a distance. It looks a lot different from there.” Also, “As you get closer and closer to the piece there is more there to see. Little gifts to the viewer.” Is God not the most amazing artist and the Earth one of His greatest works?
I have seen 4 states and 3 countries from the perspective of 30,000ft many times, but I still haven’t stopped being amazed. Partly because everywhere I go is so different from the other. Whether it’s the dry browns and reds of Arizona, the tropical beaches and nightlife of Florida, or the snow cap mountains and lush green valleys of Oregon, each one has its own beauty.
As in art class, the closer you get to it, the more and more you see. Each thing a gift to YOU. A small pool of water and a single tree, an oasis in a vast desert. The cool breeze rolling in over the warm ocean as it cools the hot sands. A cluster of trees in the woods sheltering hikers from the heavy rain while birds and squirrels make their home in its branches. It is enough to make me envy God because he sees it all. He KNOWS it all because He put it there, just for us to discover.
I have only seen a fraction of a fraction of the world and it still blows my mind. I know that I can spend my whole life traveling and never see everything that the artist put into the piece for us to discover. I don’t have the means, resources, or time, BUT nothing is going to stop me from trying. ^_^
Have you ever thought about how beautiful our Earth is? I mean really think about it. As I gaze at it now, my mind wanders to my art class I just took this semester. There are two things that my teacher said that are running through my head. “Take a step back from your work and look at it from a distance. It looks a lot different from there.” Also, “As you get closer and closer to the piece there is more there to see. Little gifts to the viewer.” Is God not the most amazing artist and the Earth one of His greatest works?
I have seen 4 states and 3 countries from the perspective of 30,000ft many times, but I still haven’t stopped being amazed. Partly because everywhere I go is so different from the other. Whether it’s the dry browns and reds of Arizona, the tropical beaches and nightlife of Florida, or the snow cap mountains and lush green valleys of Oregon, each one has its own beauty.
As in art class, the closer you get to it, the more and more you see. Each thing a gift to YOU. A small pool of water and a single tree, an oasis in a vast desert. The cool breeze rolling in over the warm ocean as it cools the hot sands. A cluster of trees in the woods sheltering hikers from the heavy rain while birds and squirrels make their home in its branches. It is enough to make me envy God because he sees it all. He KNOWS it all because He put it there, just for us to discover.
I have only seen a fraction of a fraction of the world and it still blows my mind. I know that I can spend my whole life traveling and never see everything that the artist put into the piece for us to discover. I don’t have the means, resources, or time, BUT nothing is going to stop me from trying. ^_^
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)